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Name: jasonthemexicanboy
Country: United States
Metro: Atlanta
Birthday: 1/14/1979
Gender: Male
Interests: photography, drums, carpentry, God, the bible, all things spanish, backpacking, fishing, camping, 1990 jeep grand wagoneer, the Truth
Expertise: none of the above.
Occupation: Retired
Industry: Textiles
Message: message meEmail: email me
ICQ:  www.lomography.com/thisisjscroggins
Member Since:
12/18/2004
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| i think i may give myspace a break. nah.
anyway, i have been thinking much of gods love.
im a pretty crappy dude when i look at what i have done in the past, how inconsistent i have been, and how i have left a trail of bad decisions, immaturity and insecurity. i constantly give into the flesh and put what i know of christ and his unfailing love on the shelf, to a time where it seems more convenient. i suck at finances, relationships, and at times can be pretty lazy. i overcommit myself and end up giving up under the pressure to get things done all at once. i am an opportunist and at times causes me to shun commitment because something better might be around the corner. i am a horrible organizer and that causes me to lose important stuff.
with all that said, i look at myself and wonder if i could just straighten one thing on that list out, i might know gods love. if i could just get things right, maybe god might reveal that peace of his love, and i might for once get it. i feel like (sometimes) that i have to have the stars line up for God to love me. this is not truth.
god loves me. unconditionally.
as i write that word, unconditionally, tears stream down my face because for the first time in ten years as a christian, i am beginning to understand what it means. that list above means nothing to God. he really loves me no matter what i do, or what i say, or how i act. i want to express more of how i feel about this, but its really a basic thing, and to keep explaining it would mean i would have to keep typing the same thing over and over. i havent read any books lately that made me think of this, only thoughts of my life and where i am going and who i am. i truly believe that God is shining his light on this area of my life and exposing lies that i have believed. this hurts. but i like it. i am developing, like a child, and it makes me want to grab this new world and pursue it. i am realizing that there is much more to this, and i dont want to miss it.
he is love.
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| sorry, but myspace just won out!
lots has happened as it has been since february that i last posted. much inspiration, much decisioning (good and bad), much learning, and mainly... much growth.
my heart for people, love and truth grows more everyday and im learning to manage it one day at a time. ive found that to live too far in the future brings out this sense of confusion and i end up being nothing that i really wanted to and have gone no where i really wanted to.
God gives us a sound mind. pray against satan. | | |
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just a dirty train.
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| ok, so i have been taking alot of flack for not posting. so i am now posting.
post.
anyway. i dont have much to write of. i am continually pushed by god to
be his hands and feet. i like this. ill be honest, i dont know exactly
what this means, but ill do it. when i sit and think about being hands
and feet i think of going and doing. i work with my hands all day. im a
carpenter and i make beautiful things out of long sticks of wood and
blank walls. i am constantly on my feet. i have to walk across the
house to use my hands to install the piece of moulding i have just cut
to the right size for the fit i need. ACTION. going and doing requires
action. where does action come from? MOTIVATION. what is compelling me
to make the right cut and walk across the house and install the
piece? what is it that would prompt me to move to uganda to teach
displaced children simple english and math. why would i want to go to
honduras and work with two people i barely know and with kids that have
a disease that scares me to death in a country with a language i cant
understand. what is my motivation for not having a cigarette at work
when i really want one, or not saying something i shouldnt in front of
someone who might not know me so well and think of me as a
hypocrite. what is my motivation? CHRIST. he gave up his life for
mine. That is love. "greater love has no one than this that a man lay
down his life for his friends." And we are even greater than
friends. this love is not just for me, but for the whole
world.
My whole point is that we need to put action to the motivation of the
holy spirit in us.... being the hands and feet cannot be easy. its
against everything in us. have we forgotten that lost art of suffering.
did paul not say he had to beat his body into subjection. if its
tough, does that mean its not Gods will, tell that to a
missionary whos about to lose his head for going and doing. tell
that to the business professional who turned down a bribe for thousands
just so he or she could honor christ. the hands and feet get things
done at all cost. the hands and feet move and pursue. the hands and
feet serve. the hands and feet love. the hands and feet look past
themselves. the hands and feet look past the temporal and to eternity.
the hands and feet look for truth and act on it. the hands and feet
trust. the hands and feet live above reproach so there will be no
question. the hands and feet are the motivated that will do whatever it
takes to fulfill that motivation.
just a thought.
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| hello friends. i dont have the internet anymore, so posts are few and far between.
i am listening to the current cd in my wagoneer because it is stuck in my cd player.
i hope everyone is well. stay in prayer as God works on you, and dont lose sight of the true prize in the midst of your struggles... thats what im learning.
you probably want to own this album.
j and sons | | |
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